Monday, August 3, 2009


The Monday after my back to back 12 hour shifts over the weekend is always kind of sad. I think it's the combination of the lack of sleep, the sleep during the day and the fact that most monday nights after I wake up I can't sleep again until 3 or 4 Tuesday morning so I spend a lot of that time alone, alone with my thoughts.

These are the days that I miss my huband the most. I want nothing more then for him to walk through the front door, it had been especially difficult because over the last few weeks it seems like everyone around me had been nothing but happy happy happy. It sort of feels like being single on Valentine's Day....everyone around you is sickinly happy when you are nothing but miserable.

I just want time to speed up and for it to be November already. I want to be able to see my husband again. I want a new job.....ugh I want this so much.

The thing is that this weekend is the over the hump party for Kyle's ship. We will officially be halfway through the hellish existance that is this deployment. Right now I am so far deep in the tunnel that it's pitch black, in a couple of days I hope that I can start seeing a pinprick of light at the end of the tunnel, and each day it will get bigger and bigger, until we are together again.


  1. Aw, I know JUST how you feel. I was MISERABLE when Kenny was on deployment. I felt like I was being a Debbie Downer all the time because I was so miserable, then everyone around me was couples couples couples and I was like, omg I hate you all! It felt like it was never going to end. Hang in there girl!!

  2. Yep I know those feelings all too well. It's like you never would have noticed those happy couples before, but your husband's absence just magnifies them. Awful!

  3. I feel your pain. That is exactly how I feel about deployments. Unfortunately, you are heading for the hardest part. The end of the deployment is hardest... The "he's almost home, but not quite" part.

    Hang in there. It's almost over.

    Half way through! Yeah!